I was born a poor black child

I was Born a Poor Black Child – Quotes from The Jerk

I was Born a Poor Black Child – Quotes from The Jerk

I was born a poor black child is easily the best Jerk Quotes.

First, let’s stipulate the movie has some racially insensitive parts. And a white guy saying that “I was born a poor black child” normally would be out of bounds. But somehow Steve Martin, as Navin Johnson, pulls it off.

The quote is from the beginning of the movie as Navin tries to explain how he is impoverished. The Jerk is billed as a Rags to Riches to Rags story and includes a dog named shithead. Honestly, it’s hard to imagine a better comic performance.

Other great quotes from the Movie include “He Hates Those Cans”. The scene is when the crazy gunman is trying to shoot Navin, misses & keep hitting  the cans. “Random Son of a Bitch” the shooter repeats.

Navin Johnson: He hates these cans!

Here’s some other priceless gems from the movie.

“Lord loves a workin’ man; don’t trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it.”

Navin Johnson: For one dollar I’ll guess your weight, your height, or your sex.

Navin Johnson: He hates these cans!

When talking about his skin color. “You mean it’s going to stay this color”.

 The new phone books are here! The new phone books are here!
First I get my name in the phone book and now I’m on your ass. You know, I’ll bet more people see that than the phone book.


Here’s the sequence when Navin figures our what his “special purpose” is. FYI, his “special purpose is his penis. Grandma read the letter from Navin.

Guess what! Today I found out what my special purpose is for. Gosh what a great time I had. I wish my whole family could have been here with me. Maybe some other time as I intend to do this a lot. Every chance I get. I think next week I’ll be able to send some more money as I may have extra work. My friend Patty promised me a *blowjob*. Your loving son, Navin.”

That Patty must be a sweet girl.

“- Navin: Are you a model?
– Marie: No. I’m a cosmetologist.
– Navin: Really? A cosmetologist? That’s unbelievable. That’s impressive. Must be tough handling the weightlessness.”

Frosty : Navin, you have taken in fifteen dollars and given away fifty cents worth of crap, which gives us a net profit of fourteen dollars and fifty cents. Navin R. Johnson : Ah… It’s a profit deal.

Bank Manager: I will need two pieces of identification.
– Navin: Ah yes. I have my temporary driver’s license and my astronaut application form… I didn’t pass that though, I failed everything but the date of birth.”

“Don’t call that dog lifesaver, Call him shithead.”

Speaking to Marie in bed. While Marie is asleep.

 I know we’ve only known each other four weeks and three days, but to me it seems like nine weeks and five days. The first day seemed like a week and the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again and the fourth day seemed like eight days. And the fifth day you went to see your mother and that seemed just like a day, and then you came back and later on the sixth day, in the evening, when we saw each other, that started seeming like two days, so in the evening it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day and that started seeming like four days, so at the end of the sixth day on into the seventh day, it seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half. I have it written down, but I can show it to you tomorrow if you want to see it.

I Was Born a Poor Black Child

Finally, let’s go back to the best quote. I was born black child. Honestly, comedy doesn’t get much better. Carl Reiner directed The jerk and he knows how to get the best laughs out of his actors.


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Photo by theglobalpanorama

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